So you have met someone you like and arranged a date, now the pressure is off??? Wrong, you need to make sure you avoid some dating pitfalls. Here are some helpful tips for both sexes!
1. Always be yourself – there really is no one else like you. There is nothing more attractive than someone who is comfortable with themselves. Seriously when I run singles events it is always the person who is self-confident who people find more attractive!!!!!!
2. Don’t Compare Yourself to Anyone Else – they have chosen you to go on a date with them – not someone else. Don’t do the stalking on facebook and comparing yourself with exes or friends it will only make you less confident and more insecure!
3. Be interesting – people who live their lives and have their own interests are more interesting and have more to talk about. Having a full live makes you so much more attractive. You could be hot but you will look so much less attractive if you are needy/clingy and insecure. Being interesting makes you memorable and you do want to stand you and be unique as dating can initially be competitive.
4. Be a little bit mysterious – don’t overshare on your first dates, there will be plenty of time to talk about your ‘stuff’. . Talking about your ex, the challenges of being single, how much you hate your job is never attractive. Let people like you before you show your worst side. Remember what has put you off when you have dated over people.
5. Make sure dating is fun – life can sometimes be tough so be light hearted and avoid being overly deep. Interrogating someone on the first few dates is definitely not fun and will make them feel like they are on an interview and no-one loves being interviewed!!!!
6. Do something fun and be open to interesting date options – women appreciate any effort a guy may have made to organise a date – never criticize his efforts. Men want to feel successful at pleasing a woman!!! So if something has been suggested don’t push to do something else – keep an open mind, you never know you may just have fun!
7. Listen – Don’t spend your date concentrating on what you are going to say next. Truly listening and taking an interest is very attractive!!!!!
8. Don’t be judgmental – When your date is telling you about themselves, listen to what they are saying and be respectful. Everyone hates being judged!!!!
9. Don’t rush things – take time to get to know someone. Seeing them every night for a week is NEVER a good idea!!!! It really does take a good 3 months to really get to know someone, often people take a while to really tell us who they are.
10. Don’t let your past affect your present – Deal with any issues you have had in the past! Don’t expect what has happened in a previous relationship to happen now. Comparing your date to others you have dated in the past stops you from knowing this new person. Stay in the present as that is what determines your future – seriously don’t let your past derail your present!!!!!
11. Trust your Intuition/Gut Feeling – often our sub-conscious mind picks up on information our conscious mind doesn’t. So if it doesn’t feel right it isn’t!!!!!!
12. Don’t Overthink – don’t read too much into what is said and texted. Often in the early stages people are nervous and are not so logical!!!! When I run singles events I have found ‘the players’ are more popular as they know how to talk easily, whereas a lot of the very genuine singles are very nervous. You really could be creating a problem where there isn’t one!!!! Preconceived notions can make you miss out on a great partner.
13. Never make Excuses for bad behaviour – this one needs no explanation!
14. Don’t have sex too quickly – if you want to have a relationship DON’T have sex too soon!!!
Good luck and remember dating can and should be fun!!!