How to Get Your Dating Mojo Back

By 23 June, 2020 Blog, Dating Tips
dating mojo

How do you get your dating mojo back?

You want to meet someone but feel like it is all a bit too hard at the best of times but especially after we have experienced lockdown due to COVID! How do you get your dating mojo back?

Lockdown has come and gone in many places, and you may have struggled with it to start with but then found you adjusted to the new normal. You loved the track pants, pj’s, flat shoes and no makeup!

So, how do you adjust and get your dating mojo back!  It starts with how you feel about yourself, here are some practical tips to get you back out there!

Think about what you really want to get your dating mojo back!

For many people isolife was tough and without the normal distractions, they were lonely. If you didn’t enjoy being alone in lockdown then don’t waste any more time sitting on your couch.

This may sound simple but take a moment to think about what you want and put a plan in place to get it. Get online, smile and chat with the cute guy/girl at the coffee shop and go out with friends to places you will meet other people. I can tell you that there are plenty of quality singles out there and you haven’t missed out on your chance to meet your person.

Your Mindset Matters if you want your dating mojo back!

‘Whether you think you can, or you think you can‘t – you‘re right’. Henry Ford

This is one of my favourite sayings and it is true as it emphasizes how you’re your attitude determines your success or failure. Ford is now a household name, yet Henry Ford failed many times before he succeeded. This is the attitude you need!

Do you believe you can meet someone? Your life will literally become a printout of what you believe at a deep level and I am not talking about simply using positive thinking to get what you want. For example, if you don’t believe you deserve to be happy then over time you will think and act like someone who doesn’t believe they deserve to have a good relationship.

What is your mindset? What do you believe about being able to meet someone? Does it work for you or against you getting the very thing you say you want?

Manage your Expectations

You can lose your mojo very quickly when you expect quick results! For example, you put up an online profile and expect instant results or results in the first few weeks. It can be all too easy to think that a relationship should magically appear when we decide you want it.

You need to look at finding the person you want to date as a long-term goal rather than expecting instant results. You might meet someone straight away or it might take 100 dates to find someone who works for you. Don’t give up or lose heart.  If you have put yourself out there, have dealt with your baggage and have the right mindset then it will happen when it is meant to. Enjoy the process rather than putting lots of pressure on yourself to get results.

When it comes to online dating, I recommend you go online for a set amount of time to avoid dating burnout – generally six weeks to two months.

All about YOU!

During COVID gyms and beauticians had to close! To get yourself feeling back to normal get back into the gym, get your nails done and enjoy all those services you have missed. It will instantly make you feel better. Go out and shop for a new outfit, it doesn’t have to cost you a fortune, it’s all about making sure you feel great about yourself and how you look.

Then ditch the pj’s and flats! Now isolfie has ended it is time to:

  • Put on some lippy,  heels and dress up for the ladies.
  • For the Men – iron a shirt, get dressed up and put on your best aftershave

It will instantly make you feel better and get you better results. Even if you are reading this way after COVID, how you dress will affect how you feel! Dressing well will always make you feel better about yourself and achieve better results.

Heal your Past

It can be difficult getting excited about dating when you have been hurt in love. It is important to work through the baggage before you get out there again. You may feel like it is easier to ‘get under someone new, to get over someone’, yet too often you can end up hurting the new person and yourself in the process. This is one area that a dating coach can work with you to enable you to heal.

6 Simple Dating Tips to Make Dating Easier:

1. Be in THIS Moment

Let go of looking at the past or whether this is going to work in the future. Focus on this moment, on today and the people you meet. It is important to be present even if the person isn’t a match.  know it can be all too easy to walk into the bar and turn off when you see that they aren’t a match. Instead of mentally planning what you are going to have for dinner, focus on the person for the rest of the date. You’ll never know what you might get out of it — a friend, new fun facts or maybe you could end up liking them!

It is equally important to not be outcome focussed as it just puts too much pressure on one date and one moment.

2. Show up

If you have made a plan to meet someone make sure you turn up. I know you may feel tired or like you can’t be bothered making the effort for yet another disappointing date. Yet don’t! You took the time to schedule the date, be the person who honours what they say! Adulting is keeping your plans and you never know this could be your person!

People cancelling dates within an hour of the date is much too common and something most of my clients complain about, simply don’t do be this person.

3. Be kind, be thankful

Kindness is the new black! Maybe they aren’t your cup of tea yet you can still be kind to them. I also recommend you ALWAYS say thank you to your date for their time. Oh, and if they paid for you, take the time to appreciate it by saying thank you. One of my male coaching client’s biggest complaints is women who haven’t appreciated what they have done. A simple thank you matters.

4. Stop ghosting

Don’t let ghosting be your normal! If the person isn’t for you simply let them know you don’t feel the chemistry you need to take things any further and wish them well. It only takes a moment and makes the world of difference for the other person and you never know when you might come across the person again. I have heard so many stories where people have ended up meeting people they have ghosted and it is uncomfortable. One case was where the girl was interviewed by a man she had ghosted = awkward! A simple conversation saves you future embarrassment! It is also kind!

5. Be Authentic

Being authentic, just means be yourself. Show your unique personality as you want to date someone who likes you for who you are.

6. Don’t get caught up in the dating horror story loop!

I am sure everyone has a horror story to tell about dating, that online dating is horrible and doesn’t work. Yet, it isn’t all bad and I recommend that you don’t get caught up in in the dating horror story loop of thinking it is.For as many people who have a horror story, there is a love story

Conclusion

If you are struggling to get your dating mojo back or to have the right mindset about dating/relationships why not get some help to get the results you have always wanted? A Dating Coach can do this, all you need to do is to book a no-obligation discovery call.

Here’s to your success.

Debbie 

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